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Final result that perhaps

Final result that perhaps Does not I wonder when to begin to find that smokes by oneself, can’t be given up? Whom I do not park ask why want, smoke oneself, have craving for tobacco or what? Should used to, release, begin, release also some time.

Will adapt to the environment soon when manager Sun said when going to work in the studio you can not change the environment excessively in the past, incorporate environment, but what kind of first world does it in the face of now, what kind of a society, I do not know either oneself.

Emotion hollow-ground sharp sword, oneself that fault that control can blow badly battered, it is a sharp sword that I can’t control too, always can hurt oneself each time, until the last time will dilute everything, only leave the superficial scar. It once took 2 years to forget a girl. Do not know now how much time oneself takes to smooth this scar to the marrow.

Lie in on can painful only, already suspect the picture that oneself is injured obviously, but the one that also wanted and risked one’s life rushed into the battle field. The memory of happiness and grief turns into chip and insults and forms together and lets people see and have one kind of feelings lost very much,

Performing the monodrama all the time originally, the blow constantly can not be turned over soon the body will not know to deserve what course should follow. Seem, have a lot of words want, say, know until where open one’s mouth,

Remembered the feeling drinking suddenly, I thought I had needed alcohol too now, let alcohol stimulate each cell of one’s own health, take signs of getting drunk think world this, could perfect perhaps. . .

Now has been already the 30th, perhaps waited for this month to finish life and renovate page one, hide from it so at home long, should go to face, really want to face this world with little tip, I shoulder, come down all trials and hardship, let she sheltering from at home well.

But that is only a kind of extravagant hope, the little tip should already reach a decision, our story reaches the final result too. . . If is really such a final result, I think I can not manage to be writing out either. . .

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The last wait is to leave away Once a boy knew a girl on the net, what two people had a chat about since the first day knowing found each other congenial very much, since the first day knowing, they meet each other on the net every day later. Such two persons contact for a long time on the net. Boy: I want to see you. Girl: I surf the Net at home, the computer of the family has no video, I have only the only photograph now, I issue to you The boy has seen liking and girl’s chat. The girl infers too that contacts it with the long boy. Girl: I want to see you too. Boy: I send the video to you. Girl: It is polite well to look at your appearance with eyes. Boy: There is no culture. Put the person in cultural circles. The girl has smiled. Boy: I surf the Net in the Internet cafe. Now will go home if now reaches me. Girl: The good one is over. Boy: We will meet again tomorrow.

The boy will look for a computer with video in the Internet cafe to surf the Net every day since then. Such Liang of persons gets in touch for more than half a year on the net. The girl is depressed to the boy one day: I will go to the South to work as a temporary labourer. Hear the boy after saying of the girl feel a pain very much. Boy: Is that all right to go? Girl: No way. Boy: Then how long do you go? Girl: Wonder anything. Several months. A few years   I do not know either Boy: Go. Do we meet before you go? Girl: How do we meet? Boy: I belong to XXX. Girl: I am XXX too. Boy: Then when you go to the station. Can I see you off? Girl: Let me see. Boy: I give my telephone number to you. You remember first. Girl: OK. Boy: I should leave. We will have a chat again tomorrow. Girl: I wait for you

The boy came to the Internet cafe early in the morning the next day. QQ get on head as if a gray one of girl. It may be that she has still stayed in the bed now. After two hour, the girl has not had. And girl did not still will it be several hour the past. The boy has one kind of feelings tingling in the heart. The boy thought of what girls said at yesterday, the girl left. Have gone to the South. The boy does not believe the girl that has already liked oneself has gone to the South and worked as a temporary labourer. The boy regretted not telling girls at yesterday very much. Like her oneself. The boy waits for the girl to appear on the evening of the 8th day when the girl walked on the net every day like this, the boy receives the telephone numbers of a other places, a girl’s voice has come inside. Girl: It is me, I am sorry, the one that left had not found time to meet you too suddenly. Boy: OK, I did not think you would phoning me. Girl: It can’t be. Boy: I want to tell you Girl: Want to tell me what say. Boy: I Girl: You say. What’s the matter Boy: I like you. Girl: In fact you do not say I know too. I like you too. Boy: When can you come back? Girl: I don’t know. Boy: I wait for you. Girl: It is sure to see you to wait for me to go back. Have hung the telephone after speaking the girl. The boy did not sleep well in the whole evening after making the telephone.

The boy receive the girl’s telephone in several days. Girl: Ones that pass these days, OK? Boy: Missing you every day. Girl: I miss you too. I can’t surf the Net here. Boy: I have waited for you on the net everyday since you have walked. Been less than you all the time,etc.. I have not been to the Internet cafe either now. Girl: Phones you if later so long as I am free. Boy: Will you come back? Girl: No way. Boy: I find I do not only like you now, but fall in love with you. The girl finishes saying after listening to the boy. The tears have come out uncontrollably. The girl has cried. Boy: How to remain silent. What’s the matter with you? The girl has not spoken. Cry only there. The boy hears the sound of crying in that side of the telephone. Boy: How can you cry. The girl has not spoken. Boy: Speak. How on earth are you. Girl: I have left. Hung the telephone after finishing speaking. Have made the miss of every day that the boy has begun after the telephone and waited.

The one evening after one week, the boy received the girl’s telephone. The girl has only said one sentence. My home is in that village of XXX. Wait for me to go back. I get in touch with you again. I have no time to come out afterwards. Can’t phone you. Have not come so as to speak urgently yet after saying the boy. The girl hangs the telephone. The boy is very sad and very glad too. The sad one is not to know that can be with girl. The glad one is the general address which has known girl’s family. The boy only knows that girl’s name and general address. Boy let friend ask that girl address of the house the next day. Though does not know the concrete address of girl’s family, in this way the boy looks for a lot of friends and helps him to look for. His friend has never found after passing for several months. The boy has not received the girl’s telephone either.

Have passed for more than half a year in this way. Have not find, has not received the girl’s telephone either. The boy has not given up the love to the girl all the time. Have not received the girl’s telephone either. So pass for three years. Friend of boy say, find girl concrete address of house by phone in the third year some day. The boy is very glad. The boy invited the friend to love with long girl’s family deeply oneself together early in the morning the next day. (Growing up slowly of boy in looking for the girl’s these years. Have one’s own career and car to do business by oneself from going to work to now. ) Have reached the girl’s home. After the boy has seen girls. The girl does not know who it is. Still thought that asked the way. Boy: Remember me? The girl has thought. Have not spoken. Boy: I have waited for you for three years. Have looked for you for three years too. You that we agreed come back to phone me and see me. I have been waiting for you. Wait for your appearance. I have never given up. Wait for you and me not to change the telephone number either. . The girl has cried. The girl has only spoken a word. I am sorry Boy: I love you. Girl: I am sorry. I have not already been worth your loving. I have already been engaged. Have ordered the wedding that I do not want to order. In fact I have been loving you all the time, but I have no idea, I am sorry. I love you. But we can’t go to together. Please go back. Go back. Boy: Can we embrace? The girl has not spoken. The girl goes to the boy. The boy has held girls and spoken a word. Love you for waiting for you for three years in three years. Worthy. Because I have found you. Though we come to nothing, we have beautiful beginning. May you be afterwards happy. Turn round to leave away by car after talking about boy and his friend Whether on the net or in actual life, so long as we love a person wholeheartedly no matter have a result. All of us mustn’t regret anything. Once the true love because of us

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Happiness on the road to the love What is the happiness? Happiness wind someone give you put on one coat get up, it is two person share one steamed bun to be poor. What is happiness, happiness whether brow of him wrinkle, heart of you follow him to be together getting dark too, what is the happiness? The happiness is that the day with him has many days, but you think it only several hours short, and he leaves on many days when you left you think again that seem to part for many years. The happiness is a delicate emotion not needing the speech to experience, an expression in one’s eyes, one are caressed, even a sentence of simple but dull words, can all let the other side feel, no matter the person that you love is to you, or love the person of you to you.

Having once read such an article, there are a pair of men and women in love in the article, the woman asked a man such a questions suddenly one day, if I and your poverty were penniless, anyone gives us a steamed bun when dying of hunger soon, do you say and are eaten by you or you would like to eat for me? Having in fact had answers in the woman’s heart at this time, because the man loves her so deeply, even exceed and love himself, steamed bun must be eaten for oneself. However, the man was suddenly reticent for a moment, then he is embracing women gently, the gentle one says to the woman, I will not eat the steamed bun for you, I want oneself to be eaten. The woman is amazed by in the heart, she has not expected to love her man will suddenly for such an answer to oneself so deeply, even if it is he himself that want, live on why cheat oneself he, why insist on oneself getting an answer that does not expect? The woman’s shoulder can’t help in man’s chest being quiver, the cold ice like winter which her heart cooled in a flash, what the man’s look changes quickly before her eyes too is so strange. It is clear man really for man not to seem, it is that piece that dote on her fond of kindhearted man of her in accordance with her.

The man is when after answering the woman’s question, he found out the woman’s worry, feel woman puzzledding in the heart, then he make whom health that woman tremble hold up urgent, say ” you who are dear know why why the last steamed bun is not eaten for you with the sound that is full of loving tenderly deeply, but do I myself eat? Because I want to utilize the last steamed bun to give you a piece of time to live on a bit longer to my strength, I should be after eating up the steamed bun, send for the food for you, if really there are not other things that can be fed to you, I use knife one one cut, give you wipe out meat of me, until I finish cutting my meat on one’s body, the blood flow died until I flow. “When the man finishes saying the words, the sparkling and crystal-clear teardrop flashes in the eyes. The woman has cried, cry for misunderstanding men by oneself, paying crying for dying oneself for oneself like this for the man, it can have by something in the world than pass by love such,have what kind of oath can than lasting pieces of love devotion in the the norths that steamed bun bringing. Though it is only a steamed bun.

Then I am only 16 years old when reading this story, have been really moved.

Several years passed by now, this story has not been erased in my memory all the time, do not know why, can not forget all the time. I know I wish eagerly oneself can can meet one oneself pay or even people of the life whole-heartedly so as woman in the article, the people he that I wish eagerly in the heart just find me yet at one time, really appear at my side, I am only that a face is too ignorant to find. I am always thinking so. But I often hope he is just at my side.

A things are put by my desk, not the vase, not even some ornaments, but an apple. It is 20 days since this apple has been put, the apple is no longer fresh, the gloss not already so tender as other apple and water too, even begin to have phenomenon of the rough skin. I put at desk it straight, I will see it when being careless come off duty, I will see it when being careless go to work, heart there is a kind of baffled feeling, very comfortable. This is true. The apple brings at time when I come back from that side of his. When actually took this apple, really plan to be eaten on the road. But I have not eaten on the way, I do not know why one’s own lower mouth to an apple quickly, perhaps because the apple is brought from him, it was he that bought, it was that he buys to me. So I am unwilling. Bring his apple when far away from himming, how could I be willing to to eat up it? Leave apples, silent putting it on the desk, only want to keep its fragrance and an attentive wisp of his here. Is this taste of love? It is that kind that can not see his baffled inanition in the heart, see the appearance at a loss glad again after him? Never found the love sometimes can really change a person, can make the dull tidal surge of emotion that can change float, can make tidal surge of emotion floating change like water quiet, can make two people two feeling d to meet by chance make an appointment, make two feeling make an appointmant with vigorous a solemn pledge of love.

Then,and then love line behind day meeting what like? I should ask it, ask, ask oneself whether or turn round to ask he on one side? Will turn round, want ask him, already, since an own face is getting ignorant quickly in front of him. I do not know whether I should ask, the doubt that he will be baffled that afraid. Love him, marry him, OK? Will he also love me like before or I will marry him afterwards? I whether that kind ask, needn’t have as long as the heaven and earth endure people once only, I liked the feature to observe and like the curtain in the morning and evening with each other.

Understand very much oneself is not that kind of person that asked to some extent, I needn’t ask the enjoyment of the material when the a lot of, I needn’t ask to shine gaudy money, I ask him can look like I man at the story can like to give up everything for me either, I only ask two words, that is wholehearted. The serious one is real, the heart at heart. So long as it is can all one’s life in love to be wholehearted, get when can change either, ” until everywhere old can not go the still can sing in a song, you still still regard me as the treasure of hands at heart “  . Not much else, the serious one is real, the heart at heart.

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As the hedgehog loves roses One

I one hedgehog, until sky face upward hair that blue white cloud float afternoon one meeting, stare flankly tired going to sleep of even the sun, then the meticulous one runs in the dim the firmament, look for a place lonely going to sleep that can support the exhausted heart of consolation of fragile soul.

What in the dream, I have felt cold, as if revive in the world of ice and snow, I am wanting to embrace, those made me warm, let me thirst for, but has been never getting all the time. Because I am a hedgehog, the hedgehog that it is lonely to be destined, can’t nestle, the warmth of lacking each other that give, so can only let that latent and dark indefinite material as deep and clear as dusk of the distant place corrode every night, numb under pain, have gone to sleep in numbness gradually.

Do not know whether to have another one likewise lonely soul under the same dim light of night

Two

I am a rose, a delicate and charming rose, blemish in an otherwise perfect thing is those likewise dazzling thorns, they all say so, it is those that assassinate and let me seem incompatible. Those flowers are always the lively talking about, the lonely one in as if I am noisy, can only silent to listen to in distant place, then a tired out one finish upper eyes, experiencing the sunshine quietly, but it can’t make my heart warm.

They say I am very stiff, because I am a rose, always stab those persons that wanted to treasure me. I after not at a loss again and againing, can only at dawn, a silent one look up at sky, want to know whether an likewise lonely soul keeps and looks at the sunrise, another party in the weather.

No one knows, those dewdrop as sparkling and crystal-clear as coloured glaze, the full tears including I. Who tells me, the rose is a most beautiful keeping Hou, a season beautiful, a beautiful meeting, deserve my perfectly willing wait till the end of the world.

Three

See through leaf as sunshine, chopped cooked entrails shine on me fragmentarily, I have begun another travel among the breeze, perhaps want to give one’s own soul an export, look for a comfort, perhaps the way is too far, without home, can only choose to move ahead, justice has not returned to taking care of.

This summer in the afternoon, I stand, of a block of beautiful flowering shrubs, ask flower of the rose be moved by one, I light to face upward, get up head, the first time wantonly while being light but looking the sun straight permanent, let eyes large stretch of film moist because of shouting pain, but incomparably happy, I know this is my home, my soul will sleep peacefully here. I know we are similar!

Four

The sunshine of that day is and magnificent and bright and beautiful, as indicating anything of will happen ing.

As I see a hedgehog is so direct, the so undisguised one looks up at the sun, the corner of the mouth shows the happy smile, the splendor that the tears refract out lets me lose one’s head safely. I know he is my most beautiful keeping Hou, the ends of the earth, my existence, only in order to meet with him. At that time, I believed that fairy tale about the rose!

Five

Each early morning, at each dusk, our silent looking up at, watch a flourishing performance. We silent to wait, this piece too much with pass in summer. Treasuring this moment meeting only quietly which we can do. At dusk, at the dawn, comfort each other in two pieces of likewise lonely soul.

We are similar, but does not include the couple, can’t learn all the time, by coarse means, it is warm to give each other. At that day dawn, I saw the tear of the rose, my kindhearted pain. I want to make her happy, but wonder how to do, I want to wipe the tear away for her, but can’t bear to near her. That time, I grieved discovery, we think, come frank until how funnily it is direct. We too fragile strong, let, defend, become one self- basic outfit.

On this bleak day of autumn, I wipe the last drop of tears meticulously for her for the first time, looking at her one’s own clearing up decliningly at the moment. Have a little lonely, this long a dusk again, I sunset of the remotest places of the first line alone, remember ” in spring next year, I want to see you at the first sight for that remote agreement! ” ,Recall the bit of arising in this summer and fall asleep again, silent.

In the dream, I have felt ice-cold, but I embraced a kind of warm thing at last, but the cold felt. Should be too tired, I saw I have fallen asleep in the world of ice and snow, the corner of the mouth is raised lightly.

Six

I hear calling for spring, I remember to keep Hou promise, I remember the hedgehog that meeting cried of the darkness, I am wishing eagerly to recover.

I am stretching oneself, too impatient to wait getting out of the ground, look at everywhere, but does not see my hedgehog. My light and light call, from sunrise to sunset, from spring to summer, to autumn. Leaves begin to dance confusingly confusingly, the autumn wind is dissociated among them. I am so sad as to cry, I am afraid I am busy, wait until the hedgehog, wait for him to wipe the last drop of tears away for me.

“Are you that small rose? ” Autumn wind suspend, before me, ” here, have, cost altogether hedgehog let I little rose to pass on him last year, he has said ‘ I am tired, I want quiet sleeping, I am sorry! I will turn my miss into a star a shadow is clicked and clicked, at night, at the dawn, glitter in the dreamland of your glabella ‘. ”

I have cried, I have smiled, he has not forgotten all the time, that agrees on.

Seven

The cold wind is piercingly cold, by the declining rose, some earth dry to split is blown, wrapped up in and held it in the wind, can not blow all the time, a one that does not walk is stung by those, the thorn of the hedgehog.

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